Virgin Wok Burns

Fried my arms up right alongside these tomatoes and eggs. Thanks, Saveur for helping me make sure the wok was so hot that my eggs spattered scalding grease on my poor forearms. I am like a real Chinese person now, or what?

But it was really delicious, after all that. Plus, due to the extraordinary heat emanating from my extraordinarily large gas burner, this meal took exactly forty-eight seconds to cook.

Huge, huge thank yous to Frank Baldivino for my sick new giant wok.